Ten Things That Only Keto Parents Would Understand

We are excited to welcome back Dana Haddox-Wright, keto mom and guest blogger extraordinaire! Dana lives in Connecticut with her husband and two adorable daughters. Her 5-year-old daughter has Dravet Syndrome and has been on the ketogenic diet for nearly two years. Many of you will relate to Dana’s list of “Ten Things that Only Keto-Parents Would Understand” and hopefully it will put a smile on your faces! In case you missed it, be sure to check out Dana’s previous post on tips for making the ketogenic diet fun for your child.


Top10parents

  1. If “measuring to the tenth of a gram” was an Olympic sport, we would fill the medal podium. One of the best things about nailing a perfect measurement of heavy cream, egg, oil, or mayonnaise is being able to share the accomplishment with another keto-parent knowing that s/he will fully understand what a big deal it is, and will probably give you a well- deserved high five (or virtual high five in my case).
  2. It’s all about that spatula. Admit it. We have our favorites. If we see a good deal on “the one,” we buy the entire lot. Our motto is “no morsel left behind,” and we should expect nothing less from our utensils.
  3. Size DOES matter to us. Yes, when it comes to our keto-related staples, no “standard” sizes will do. We ALWAYS buy the industrial sized items found at our favorite wholesale store, and will rejoice in the idea of not having to shop for them again for weeks. Whether it is gallon sized bins of mayonnaise, triple stacked flat of eggs, or double rolls of parchment paper, we do what we have to do in order to ensure we never run out of what we use most. And lugging them from the car into the house does qualify as a workout. No flabby arms here.
  4. We have a system for organizing our recipes that only we understand. And I am certain that some of us even have stacks of papers with hand-written recipes which may or may not be stained with oil or butter. The funny thing is that no matter how unorganized my recipes might be, when I need to find something I know exactly where to find it in my mound of notes.
  5. We have highly developed ninja-like reflexes when it comes to “non keto-friendly” food getting into the hands (or mouths) of our children. We can snatch any carb-filled goody away from our kids within milliseconds if they are either offered something or if they find it on their own. We are also not opposed to digging food out of their mouths.
  6. We are forced to be short-order cooks. Making different meals for different people becomes pretty much a daily occurrence. We learn to cook quickly and efficiently for our entire family. And the mess of dishes left is reason enough to hire a bus boy.
  7. We often have a space designated for all of our keto paraphernalia. It usually will include lots of dry food items and small containers with color coded labels (and those beloved spatulas). Let us not forget the variety of cups and bottles, even straws we also have around in order to ensure we get enough water into our kiddos.
  8. We have more silicone items in our kitchen than in a plastic surgeon’s office, and probably spend nearly as much money as we would having a procedure done. Candy molds, cupcake liners, and baking pans (oh my!). If it does not stick, we must get it.
  9. We get every last bit of food into our kids at any cost. We see any minute speck of food left in a bowl, on a plate, or in a glass. We do not miss a thing, and I should add that we could probably work in a forensics lab.
  10. It is not uncommon to have a love/hate relationship with the keto diet. We really want to hate it because it takes up every last minute of our lives, but we love it for all of the benefits that following it has for the children. I hope that I speak for a lot of parents when I say that I would rather spend 30 minutes preparing a meal for my daughter, than I would witnessing her seize for another second.

-Dana

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